Men Against Rape

We are a group of men working in the UCSB community to end sexual violence. Our approach focuses on the role men have to play to bring about real change in society. That is, men are the ones who are doing 99.9% of the raping, and it is high time that men start accepting responsibility for rape. We do not hate men, and we do not think that all men rape. In fact, most men do not. But the ones who do make us all look bad, and what’s worse, “normal” male behavior hides rapists.

When it is “cool” for a guy to objectify women and to think that a woman “wants it” if she dresses a certain way, when we think that women are cold bitches if they won’t sleep with us and sluts if they do, when men are players or G’s when they “get some” but just a little fag when they don’t, when men don’t take no for an answer because she must just be playing hard to get, we create a climate where we view women as sexual objects to be had by men, and not as autonomous beings who have the right to turn us down and for us to listen and respect what they have to say.

Of course, men are not the knights in shining armor here to save the damsels in distress. And it is not as if the culture only hurts women. Men are not allowed to show any real range of emotion in public: we are limited to anger, competitiveness. This is not because men do not feel, but we do not allow ourselves to show it. This hurts our relationships with women, and with each other. We are all in this together, and when men and women start dialoguing, trusting and respecting each other, then everyone benefits.