Men Against Rape

An animated story of a turning point in my life. This video request is long overdue.
It was requested by subscribers quite a while ago that I make and upload this. I started in Feb. but the situation in life got better (thank god) and I never had time to complete it. Now that it is done I must upload an updated version of “my story” as my life has taken a much needed change for the better.
This is a very serious clip. I ask of you, if you are a victim of abuse, please, PLEASE, go to this site:
http://www.ndvh.org/
Break the silence, make the call!
Resources:
Statistics: Stats Canada.
Songs: Mao – Angelic Butterfly; Dixie Chicks – Make nice
If you are unable to hear me in the beginning here is what I said:
It was only six months ago
I had a normal life
normal chores normal house and a place to rest my head
but then
in one night
everything changed
One guy
One mistake
Months of tears
I took up my roots
I packed all my memories
I packed all my dreams
My goals my passions and I moved away
My dad arrived, we packed the truck. I moved two buildings over.
he bought me a sofa, it was my new bed.
for 2 months all my dreams, all my nightmares were absorbed by those sofa cushions
I worked hard, I saved everything. Now I have a new bed a new wardrobe and a new begginning
But my life, it continues to change.
I feel as though I were on a bike.
And I climbed to the top of the highest hill.
I set up camp, I became comfortable.
And one day a loving friend
A trusted partner, took it upon himself to push me down that hill on my bike
And before i knew it I was flying down that hill I had worked so hard to climb.
My bike wobbled unsteadily and I learned too late that I did not have brakes.
There was no more I could do than to hold onto my handles and pray that I’d make it to the bottom without crashing. I’m still falling.
But I know if I make it to the bottom. I will never again climb to the top. The risk is far too great that I’ll only get pushed down once more.
Instead if I survive I will bike far away from my past and never look back.
It was only six months ago.
If you were unable to read the stats in the video they are listed below:

We fought for the right to vote
Only we stopped short
Many are abused, too many!
Enough is enough!
Now is the time to speak up!

On average 182 females were killed every year in Canada.
27 – husband
20 – common-law partner
15 – divorced or separated husband

76% of women sought refuge in shelters across Canada in 2004.

Of those who report the abuse:
70% – experience physical abuse.
50% – experience threats
46% – experience financial abuse
31% – experience harassment
27% – experience sexual abuse.

40% of these women had been in a shelter the previous year.
38% had been there 2-4 times.
10% five times or more!

Emotional abuse IS abuse!

November 25th is the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women.

DON’T be a victim!
Speak out!

Duration : 0:9:5

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This video was created for a class project in FCM 8420 Epidemiology at the University of Missouri, Columbia, Spring 2010. Every 9 seconds a woman is battered in the United States (National Statistics, 2010). One out of four women will experience domestic violence in their lifetime (National Statistics, 2010). Studies conducted by the Surgeon Generals office reveal that domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44, which is more common than automobile accidents, muggings, and cancer deaths combined (National Statistics, 2010). When alcohol or drugs are involved, the risk of severity and lethality of intimate violence increases (Sharps et al., 2003). Intimate partner violence (IPV) is a serious and ongoing issue on college campuses and sufficient evidence regarding the effectiveness of counseling for intimate partner violence is lacking (Rhodes & Levinson, 2003). In order to shed some light on this sensitive topic, our video focuses on the various types of IPV as well as highlights some information on places victims of IPV can go.
Although the physical and sexual forms of IPV are more widespread and recognizable, emotional IPV is another form that occurs. The duration or frequency of IPV can vary as well as the severity, but regardless of the number of incidences or duration, no one should ever have to experience any form of IPV.
All forms of IPV are preventable. Due to the overwhelming prevalence of IPV as a cause of injury to women, counselors on college campuses must be trained to understand the physical effects of abuse, along with the mental and emotional effects that are occurring. All of these factors regarding IPV must be examined for intervention and treatment to be effective.
At the University of Missouri, the Relationship and Sexual Violence Prevention (RSVP) Center is an education and resource service for Mizzous students. RSVP Peer Educators, Greek Advocates, Stronger Together Against Relationship & Sexual Violence (STARS), and Men Against Relationship & Sexual Violence (MARS) are student organizations that help spearhead the efforts of RSVP. Depending on the need of the victim, RSVP can help victims of IPV seek the appropriate avenues of treatment, which may include: the MU Counseling Center, The Shelter, The Columbia Police Department, Attorneys on the MU campus, and the Student Conduct Office.
References

Daniels, K. (2005). Intimate Partner Violence and Depression: A Deadly Comorbidity. Journal of Psychosocial Nursing and Mental Health Services. 43(1), 44-51.

Forke, C.M, Myers, R.K., Catallozzi, M., & Schwarz, D.F. (2008). Relationship Violence Among Female and Male College Undergraduate Students. Arch Pediatrics Adolescent Medical, 162(7), 634-641

Hove, M.C., Parkhill, M.R., Neighbors, C., McConchie, J.M., Fossos, N. (2010). Alcohol Consumption and Intimate Partner Violence Perpetration among College Students: The Role of Self-Determination. Journal of Studies on Alcohol or Drugs. 71(1). 78-85.

Intimate Partner Violence Can Lead to Serious Injury. Retrieved April 28th, 2010 from the Centers for Disease Control: http://www.cdc.gov/Features/IntimatePartnerViolence/

National Statistics. Retrieved April 26th, 2010 from the Partnership Against Domestic Violence:
http://www.padv.org/statistics.aspx

Nicolaidis, C., McFarland, B., Curry, M., Gerrity, M. (2009). Differences in Physical and Mental Health Symptoms and Mental Health Utilization Associated With Intimate-Partner Violence Versus Childhood Abuse. Psychosomatics. 50(4), 340-346.

Rhondes, K.V., Levinson, W. (2003). Interventions for Intimate Partner Violence Against Women: Clinical Applications. Journal of American Medical Association. 289(5). 601-605.

Saltzman L.E., Fanslow J.L., McMahon P.M., Shelley G.A. (2002). Intimate partner violence surveillance: uniform definitions and recommended data elements, version 1.0. Atlanta (GA): Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Center for Injury Prevention and Control. Available from the Centers for Disease Control: http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/pubres/ipv_surveillance/intimate.htm

Stein, A., Tran, G., Fisher, B. (2009). Intimate Partner Violence Experience and Expectations Among College Women in Dating Relationships: Implications for Behavioral Interventions. Violence and Victims. 24(2). 152-162.

Music Hope by Kendra Springer

Created by Fiona Asigbee, Mary-Claire Howe, and Lindsay Parsons

Duration : 0:2:25

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Domestic abuse is on the increase in New Zealand and so is the level of violence involved.
That is worrying enough for those who help the victims, but most alarming, they say, is a rise in the use of strangulation.
It is a violent act where just seconds can mean the difference between life and a horrific death.
One woman or child is killed every 12-and-a-half days in New Zealand as the result of domestic violence.
Jill Proudfoot from victim’s refuge Shine (Safer Homes in NZ Everyday) says strangulation is basically power display.
“It’s saying I could kill you if I want to. Whenever you attack a person’s throat you’re saying I could kill you,” says Proudfoot.
Two recent high profile murder cases in New Zealand involved strangulation.
Nai Yin Xue literally squeezed the life out of his wife and just days before Clayton Weatherston killed and mutilated Sophie Elliot, her mother, Lesley Elliott, says he had held his arm around her throat.
Annette Gillespie from Women’s Refuge says sometimes women do not understand the significance of strangulation and that it is in fact an attempt to kill.
Proudfoot says the fact that Weatherston put his arm across Elliott’s throat was a real warning sign.
The strangulation statistics make for disturbing reading.
There are no visible injuries 90% of the time, so it is hard for a victim to prove what has happened.
In 90% of cases there has been a history of domestic violence and in 99% of the cases, those who resort to using strangulation, are men.
Despite the dangers, many stay with their abuser, even though it might lead to more terrifying consequences.
“I had one woman say to me at least while I’m living with him I know where he is,” says Proudfoot.
ONE News spoke to a woman who finally found the courage to leave her abusive partner.
She says he threw her into a doorway, pushed her on to the ground and when she had the chance to run, he chased her through the house.
She says it filled her days with terror. Worst of all she says, all this happened right in front of their children.
“He ended up pushing me on top of my then four-year-old daughter,” says the victim.
After two decades of intense psychological abuse, her husband had started getting physical.
“I knew I had to get out for me and then I would fight for my children even if I had to walk out the door without them,” says the woman.
She says she used to be one of those women who did not have the courage to leave.
“Even if a woman thinks she’s in an abusive situation, even if she’s doubting herself, (she needs) to talk to somebody. I left it way too late,” she says.
She hopes her story will help others escape the violence, too.

Duration : 0:2:54

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Be apart of the solution, not apart of the problem. This epidemic is bigger then just Chris Brown and Rihanna. Your support should be towards the problem, not to place blame. It’s time to end Domestic Violence and we could be the generation to do it.

Duration : 0:6:4

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Exploration of the tradition of violence in America, drawing on the history of invading settlers and native peoples, frontier outlaws and modern-day murderers, racist violence, the urban underclass, and domestic abuse. Narrated by Julian Bond, with commentary by Cornell West. Caution: Contains scenes that may be disturbing to young or sensitive viewers.

More info at http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0324451/

Duration : 0:9:28

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Violence in the media

Duration : 0:4:5

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The Center Against Domestic Violence, one of the first organizations to provide shelter from violence at home, now shelters 1,000 women and children and works with 30,000 teens to prevent relationship abuse each year.

video supplied by fountainhead.com

Duration : 0:3:1

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The Center Against Domestic Violence, one of the first organizations to provide shelter from violence at home, now shelters 1,000 women and children and works with 30,000 teens to prevent relationship abuse each year.

video supplied by fountainhead.com

Duration : 0:6:36

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Chris Brown pieced her pretty good, what do ya’ll think?? I’m shocked….See www.tmz.com for more.

Duration : 0:0:21

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Pakistan is a conservative Muslim country, where women – especially in poor, rural areas – can be treated like commodities with little protection provided by the police and under pressure not to disgrace their families.

“Their families will say ‘it’s the wrong thing to go to the courts, what will society think about you?’” said Sana Masood, the legal coordinator with Pakistan’s Acid Survivors Foundation (ASF).

The nation remains without a domestic violence law. It has been drafted, but lawmakers say it is still under debate because a senator from a hardline Islamic party raised objections and sent the bill back to parliament…..

Acid attacks are rising, with ASF recording 48 cases in 2009 and Masood says countless more probably go unreported because of social stigma. That is up from about 30 cases in 2007, a rise that Masood says could be blamed on increased stress in people’s lives as the country’s economy deteriorates.

Farhat was just 13 years old when a man threw acid in her face in 2003 because her parents refused to let him marry her….. Chief Justice Iftikhar Mohammad Chaudhry took a personal interest in the case, and recommended that the government pass new legislation to control the sale of acid and increase punishment for acid attacks.

…..industrial-strength acid used in cotton processing can be bought by anyone for just a few dollars. “Because of its easy accessibility to the general public, for very stupid domestic issues they will just throw acid on each other,” she said. “It does not only destroy a person’s face but it destroys a person’s life.”
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/expat/expatnews/6935405/Pakistans-acid-attack-victims-pin-hope-on-new-laws.html

Pakistan edges closer to banning domestic violence – ”People don’t appreciate women who go to police stations,” the 38-year-old says. ”I just thought it was my destiny, my fate.”

Rights advocates hope a proposed law banning domestic violence will chip away at such attitudes, giving women a more even playing field and bringing Pakistan in line with a growing number of developing nations that have outlawed spousal abuse.

But several lawmakers in Parliament are objecting, claiming the law could tear apart the social fabric by undermining families.

Violence against women is a widespread phenomenon in Pakistan, a Muslim-majority nation of 175 million where most people are poor, only half the adults can read and extremist ideologies, including the Taliban’s, are gaining traction….. surveys have shown up to 80 per cent of wives in rural parts of Pakistan fear physical violence from their husbands, while 50 per cent of women in urban areas admit their husbands beat them, according to a 2009 US State Department report on Pakistan.

”It happens even in good families — wealthier families,” says Yasmeen Rehman, the sponsor of the bill now stuck in a committee in Parliament. ”In the rural areas, it’s almost like a habit for the men.”

The bill lays out a broad definition of domestic violence beyond assault, including emotional abuse, stalking and wrongful confinement. Depriving a spouse of money or other resources needed to survive is also considered a violation.

The bill strives to cover everyone in a household, including elderly parents, children and husbands. It also sets up local ”protection committees,” which are required to include women and empowered to file complaints on behalf of victims.

Abusers can face months or years in prison and thousands of dollars in fines if they violate court protection orders, the bill says.

Under current Pakistani law, women could turn to anti-assault statutes, but unless they are severely beaten, such claims are hard to prove, activists say. Police are rarely willing to interfere in domestic matters and often don’t take women seriously.

Most women are unwilling to report on a family member, especially if he’s the breadwinner, and they give in to societal pressure to just put up with the abuse…..

”Laws are very good, but unless and until you change the mindset of the people, things won’t change,” said Nayyar Shabana Kiyani, who has worked on the legislation as part of the The Aurat Foundation….. http://www.dawn.com/wps/wcm/connect/dawn-content-library/dawn/news/pakistan/04-pak-domestic-violence-qs-11

Acid attacks a serious concern in Pakistan http://www.ethicsinaction.asia/archive/2010-ethics-in-action/vol.-4-no.-1-february-2010/acid-attacks-a-serious-concern-in-pakistan (see PICS)

http://www.123muslim.com/discussion-room/8107-acid-attacks-women-horrific-act.html

http://www.unhcr.org/refworld/country,,IRIN,,PAK,,498ab6421e,0.html

Pakistan’s Acid-Attack Victims Fight Back http://www.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1971124,00.html

Misogyny …is hatred (or contempt) of women or girls http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Misogyny

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acid_throwing

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hudood_Ordinance

Duration : 0:2:56

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