Sister – In – Law is blaming me for taking son away from violent home?

March 42010

I recently left my verbally and emotionally abusive husband. I have been living in a women’s home for the past week with my two year old son. His sister has constantly called around different homes looking for me, but mainly for my son. She has even gone as far as e-mailing the center where I’m at in an attempt to blame me for taking away his son. Of course, I cannot discuss location and so she doesn’t know the exact place where I am. I have had little contact with my husband and none with her. I found this out from my case manager. I am really mad because it is none of her business first of all, and she believes everything her little brother tells her. The whole family is in denial about his behavior. Am I wrong for feeling this way? Is there any action I can take? Can they try to take action against me? The courts would eventually find out I am living in a home for domestic violence, so would it be in my favor?

Please respond in a nice manor as I’m a confused woman r

Sadly most family members refuse to believe their son or daughter would be violent to family members. He is crying on their shoulder and they are listening.
But you did the right thing and sometimes the right thing is the hardest thing to do. Don’t listen to the family members and especially his family. Do what they say because now he will be even more violent. Move at least 3 states away and change your name or you will have them on your door step harrasseing you from now on. Get a legal divorce. Then leave.

Family court custody question I had already posted this question but I guess I didnt put enough info, plz help

March 22010

ALL OF THIS WAS ALREADY POSTED BUT THERE IS NEW INFO AT THE BOTTOM
I STAY IN LANSING, MICHIGAN
I am 14 years old and have a sister who is 9 years old. My dad is slowly about to die really soon and he is not my biological father and he never adopted me but he is my little sister’s biological father. What I want to know is at what age could I try to see about moving out of my mother’s house or could I even try to move out and take care of my sister. What steps would I have to follow in order to do that? My mom has a past record of Prostitution, driving while intoxicated, domestic violence, and maybe drug possession I feel very strongly that when my dad passes she will go back to that lifestyle she already speaks about going back and doing things from her past or that she would like to commit suicide. She is a alcoholic and has already started using drugs again every once in a while, she is very emotional and short tempered and can sometime become some what abusive and take things out on me and my younger sister as well as my dad. My family would not take us in if something were to happen because of past arguments between my mother and family and because they are races against blacks. And my mom is not capable of taking care of us she has never had a job and has relied on my dad for the last 13 or 14 years. And far as my biological dad he is in prison I don’t want me and my sister to be places in foster care so I have never spoke up about any of the problems going on in my home. I just really need to know what age at the youngest could I try to move out and keep my sister with me. I have already looked into places and some what figured out the cost of living In some area’s and this is what I came up with ……..

Rent $390, Bus fair $70 monthly includes me and my sister, Electric $25- $50, Food $200 that’s with budget and cooking foods that last, personal & household items $200, all the total of $910.00 plus maybe a little more. I also know I need to keep extra money incase of emergency. If a can get these two jobs this is the pay I would have.

8am – 4pm at 4.75 a hour 7 days a week

38 a day
266 a week
798 for 3 weeks
1,064 for 4 weeks

computer center 5pm- 8pm 5.85 a hour 5 days a week

17.55 a day
87.75 a week
263.25 for 3 weeks
351.00 for 4 weeks

This is my total I come up with for both jobs together.
adding 3 weeks
798.00
263.25
is 1061.25
left is 151.25

adding 4 weeks
1,064.00
351.00
is 1415.00
left is 505.00

If you haven’t noticed I am really serious about this. And as for school I will continue with school online and my sister could still go to school and then during the day be with me at the computer center while she does her homework and when I get out of work we would be home together.

NEW INFO POSTED AFTER ORIGINAL QUESTION
I guess I might not have made it very clear and I apologize for any confusion but no there is nobody else in my family who I could turn to. My mother had to give up two kids before me and my sister and they both live with other people in my family but because of that situation my mom had problems with other family members and chased them all away and its to the point where even though my older sisters are still in my family we can no longer see them and the rest think me and my little sister are a bad influence and have no respect because of the way are mother acts, which by the way I dislike very much cause I am nothing like my parents. But the only people in our family who would speak to us were my grandparents and my grandfather died in 04 and my grandmother just passed in June of 07.

There use to be one person “My Cousin” she is 22 years old and she stills wants to get custody of me but because of some legal issue’s she might not be able to. See my birthday just passed and in July I completely lost it for a second because of the fact my grandmother had just passed and my dad is dieing and my mother is slowly killing herself as well. So I ended up drinking some alcohol at my cousin’s house while my cousin was in the bathroom and I drank so much in such short time that I had actually drunk myself into a coma. I still have yet to deal with that whole court issue because its not coming up until the 17th of this month so I have no idea what they will say as far as my cousin but she has been the only one who looks after me and helps me. She had got 2 beds one for me and another for my sister and got clothes and other personal items for us. We would stay with her for most of the summer and during the weekends while there was school. But now since this happened my mom has not let me have any contact with her and blames her for my actions when I take full responsibility because I know I was in the wrong.

Well you have many many options. I grew up with a mother like yours that didnt really pay any attention to me due to drinking and drugs but there is hope.! First off your mom may be upset with you, but one thing you could do is call your local hospital and see what you need to do about getting your mom committed to a mental health ward. I work at one of those now and its not all mental health people, that are a lot of people that are there with an addictions as well. Maybe if you can get her to go there and get help and complete treatment and she can see what she is doing to your family maybe she can change and things can be different in the long run. ( You would just need to tell the hospital/dr that she has made comments about being suicidal, and has addictions to drinking/drugs. As far as living with your cousin that would have to go through the courts, but every state is different and every state has different rules. If you were to call DHS and explain your situation they could help you. I know lots of people are scared about going into foster homes and having to change there whole life, But honestly think about it.. It would give you someone to give you the things you need to leave and let you be the kid you are ( young adult) I know its hard considering you have taken care of yourself for some part of your life but honestly its the best thing to do. I didnt do that I took the other path and started working and tried to stay out of the foster business and now i am 23 yrs old and im exhausted. I have worked and worked and worked, completed hs and have had 3 jobs at once most of my life. at your age you dont want to start living life as an adult it will hurt you in the long run. You can also call, churches, or shelters and stay there, As of know if you left home without permission you would be considered a run away. I am not sure were you live but the streets would not be giving you the life you deserve. My honest answer is to seek help from the people and resources you have to use around you. Check into DHS, and your local hospital. And or just ask a councelor at your school. I know this is a scary time for you and your sisters, but dont bring yourself down. Be a role model for your sister and point her in the right direction. And as far as the drinking. Try as hard as you can not to go down that path, You see what kind of life you have from your mothers drinking and what it has done to her, Dont do it to yourself your way better then that.

4th Street Forum | Program | #808

February 282010

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, DANGEROUS HOMES
Moderator Denise Callaway and a panel of experts explore why women are more likely to be victims of violence at home than anywhere else, and how the cycle of abuse can be stopped. Guests: John Chisholm, Milwaukee County District Attorney; Tess Meuer, Director,Legal Department Wisconsin coalition against domestic violence (WCADV); Olusegun Sijuwade, Instructor, Working with Men, Families, and Peace, Alma Center; and, Audrey Skwieraski, Coordinator, Milwaukee Commission on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault.
http://www.mptv.org/shows/4th_street_forum/

Duration : 0:57:33

Read the rest of this entry »

Technorati Tags: ,

Would you rather have rule the world: the USA or Europe?

February 282010

Europe: very few people of color in local or national government or in the media out of a continent that is 20% minority; separate but equal is still practiced. Discrimination is rampant.
USA: minorities have been influential and powerful in the U.S. for decades and are very visible on TV and in pop culture. Americans recently elected a black president. Oprah has more money than the French university system. Arab-Americans are some of the most prosperous in the U.S.; Arabs in Europe are poverty-stricken for generations.

Gay marriage and gay adoptions are illegal in most of Europe. There are only four countries which permit gay marriage. Scandinavia does not have gay marriage, but gay domestic partnerships, the same they currently have in California. But bans on gay marriage and gay adoptions have been upheld by European courts, including Sweden.
Gay marriage is permitted in three states, and several allow civil unions, virtually the exact same benefits as marriage. Of the states that ban gay marriage, only two ban gay adoptions. Even Alabama permits gays to adopt, unlike France and Sweden. Muslim radicalism is pushing back gay rights in many parts of Europe, including the Netherlands where attacks against gays are far more common than in the U.S.

Domestic violence in Europe is one of the highest in the industrialized world–3x higher than in the U.S. which actually has a higher reporting average than Europe—still the U.S. rate is lower. Overall crime is also higher in Europe today than the U.S. Crime in the U.S. has been steadily dropping for 15 years; it has risen steadily in Europe. Europe’s street crime is 5x higher than street crime in the U.S.

Europe’s unemployment rate rarely goes under 10%. Americans freak out if their unemployment rate hits 6%.
The elderly in Europe are abused and neglected. In the summer of 2004 a heat wave in Europe resulted in 45,000 deaths (25,000 in France alone) mostly of old people. Relatives left their bodies at government-run morgues, sometimes leaving them outside on the doorstep. The heat wave came in August and most didn’t want to end their month-long vacations.
The elderly in the U.S. move to Florida or Arizona and live like decadent royalty, sucking their grandchildren’s futures dry off government-funded pyramid scams.

Europe has no comprehension of free speech. It is still grappling with “hate speech codes” and its effect on liberty. Cartoons cause riots in Europe.
Americans dealt with the issue of freedom of expression 200 years ago, most specifically with the “Cartoon Defense” in which the U.S. Supreme Court said that government cannot sue newspapers over cartoon parodies. They still riot over cartoons in Europe. The French president recently sued the manufacturer of a doll made in his likeness because he thought it was insulting. The court ruled partially in his favor.

Ok, liberals, come to Europe’s defense! Let’s hear all you people who think Europe is the center of the universe come and rescue it from my horrible outburst! Come, liberals, don’t take this sitting down. You must find a way to support Europe and debase the U.S. It’s part of your religion! Now do it!

Europe has 731,000,000 inhabitants in 58 countries. We speak many different languages, and have very different degrees of wealth and prosperity.

When you say Europe do you mean European Union? Well EU has 27 different countries. Do you think that the UK and Romania have the same problems regarding minorities?

And unemployment… in Portugal it’s now 7,8% and it feels like the world is coming to an end.

"In May 2007 unemployment in the EU stood at 7%". and that is the average. And it’s a very high number, due the the world economic crisis. And this rate is this high because in some recent members the unemployment is very, very high.

«The elderly in Europe are abused and neglected…»

How can you say Europe like it’s Canada, or Brazil, like it’s a single and uniform country? Do you think that the elderly are treated in the same way in all countries? Do you believe that there is only one culture, one history in Europe?

«Europe has no comprehension of free speech».

That is so outrageous that I can hardly find the words to reply. Do you know how many people have died so we could could enjoy freedom, free speech, elections? How can you say that we have no understanding of free speech. That’s a insult and a lie. (or are you talking about Russia?, Are you confusing the Russian "democracy" with what the EU is about?)

Yes, there is racism in Europe, yes there is still some inequality between men and women. Yes, the laws regarding gay rights have a lot to evolve. But every country has different levels of development. And no, the average, on these aspects, does not show a Dark Ages Europe, a chaotic and uncivilized Europe like you were trying to demonstrate.

And no ABSOLUTELY not, neither America nor Europe should rule the world. There are 193 countries, 192 of which are represented in the UN. We should cooperate. Acknowledging that some countries have more influence, but not turning that bigger political influence into a "license to rule the world".

family court question I need help please a.s.a.p?

February 262010

I am 14 years old and have a sister who is 9 years old. My dad is slowly about to die really soon and he is not my biological father and he never adopted me but he is my little sister’s biological father. What I want to know is at what age could I try to see about moving out of my mother’s house or could I even try to move out and take care of my sister. What steps would I have to follow in order to do that? My mom has a past record of Prostitution, driving while intoxicated, domestic violence, and maybe drug possession I feel very strongly that when my dad passes she will go back to that lifestyle she already speaks about going back and doing things from her past or that she would like to commit suicide. She is a alcoholic and has already started using drugs again every once in a while, she is very emotional and short tempered and can sometime become some what abusive and take things out on me and my younger sister as well as my dad. My family would not take us in if something were to happen because of past arguments between my mother and family and because they are races against blacks. And my mom is not capable of taking care of us she has never had a job and has relied on my dad for the last 13 or 14 years. And far as my biological dad he is in prison I don’t want me and my sister to be places in foster care so I have never spoke up about any of the problems going on in my home. I just really need to know what age at the youngest could I try to move out and keep my sister with me. I have already looked into places and some what figured out the cost of living In some area’s and this is what I came up with ……..

Rent $390, Bus fair $70 monthly includes me and my sister, Electric $25- $50, Food $200 that’s with budget and cooking foods that last, personal & household items $200, all the total of $910.00 plus maybe a little more. I also know I need to keep extra money incase of emergency. If a can get these two jobs this is the pay I would have.

8am – 4pm at 4.75 a hour 7 days a week

38 a day
266 a week
798 for 3 weeks
1,064 for 4 weeks

computer center 5pm- 8pm 5.85 a hour 5 days a week

17.55 a day
87.75 a week
263.25 for 3 weeks
351.00 for 4 weeks

This is my total I come up with for both jobs together.
adding 3 weeks
798.00
263.25
is 1061.25
left is 261.25

adding 4 weeks
1,064.00
351.00
is 1415.00
left is 615.00

If you haven’t noticed I am really serious about this. And as for school I will continue with school online and my sister could still go to school and then during the day be with me at the computer center while she does her homework and when I get out of work we would be home together.
I stay in Lansing, Michigan
I REPOSTED THIS QUESTION WITH MORE INFO TO SEE MORE TO HELP YOU UNDERSTAND MY QUESTION PLZ GO TO THIS LINK

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ah0.8x.vBvuiiQz0uuaveOrsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20070908183527AAYkxoK

At 16 you can go to court and be declared a legal adult. At least in CT. That will solve the hours worked. Yes under 18 you are restricted with hours you can work and you can’t enter into contract BUT if you are emancipated this no longer applies…you are a LEGAL adult.

You will hit big bumps in the road. You will face real problems with work, money, and food. However you do seem very serious and willing to give it a good try. If you can become emancipated… your second step would be to get yourself set up and working …. paying your way and getting everything in order to get custody of your sister. See a family attorney at this point. Explain what you want to do and why. The first consultation is usually free and you’ll get some good advice.

You can get custody at 16 if you are emancipated. Again you would be considered an adult….which means if you screw up it’s on your head. Use the time between now and then to get advice from any sources you can. Find out what services might be availible to you once you are on your own. Good luck

the mediation centre under lucknow bench of allahabad high court had passed a settlement order the terms of wh?

February 242010

settlement order the terms of which were to be followed by me and my wife alike.but now as i have followed the order verbatim,she has defied most of the orders.the case was in relation to a domestic violence which my wife framed against me falsely implicating me.Now what remedy do I have?Can I file a writ in the High Court myself on line or by sending a mail in the name of the Chief Justice,ALLAHABAD H.C.?

Appeal the court’s ruling to a higher authority.

President Bush Creates the Family Justice Center Initiative in 2003

February 222010

On October 8, 2003, President George W. Bush hailed the San Diego Family Justice Center model of co-located services to help victims of domestic violence and created a national initiative to start more such multi-agency centers. In 2005, Congress made Family Justice Centers a “purpose area” in the violence against women Act. Today, there are more than 50 such Centers in the United States and over 50 more in planning stages. Each Center is unique but the focus is similar — trying to identify all needed services for victims of family violence and their children and then putting those services under one roof so that victims don’t have to go from agency to agency and place to place to get the help they need.

Duration : 0:4:21

Read the rest of this entry »

Technorati Tags: , ,

Would you support this campaign against abusive women?

February 222010

Erin Pizzey, the campaigner who pioneered treatment for abused women by setting up the world’s first refuge centre for victims of domestic violence in the 1970s, is now turning her attention to another group of often overlooked victims: men.

Launching an online campaign and research project aimed at bringing the issue out in the open, Ms Pizzey, wife of broadcaster Jack Pizzey, aims to raise awareness of abuse perpetrated by women against men, a subject she describes as "one of the last taboos".

As many as one in six men are thought to suffer physical and mental abuse at the hands of women, yet the topic is widely seen as insignificant or implausible. Says Ms Pizzey: I feel that this kind of violence is one of the last taboos men are reluctant to talk about it, and so are the women who are doing it, said Ms Pizzey, whose father was abused by her mother. Much is known and studied about male violence, but very little is written about women, and any attempt to discuss female violence is met with rabid attacks and howls of ‘blaming the victim’.
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/defender-of-abused-women-finds-a-new-cause-male-victims-770636.html

I think its wonderful that someone is finally bringing to light male victims. Abuse should never be tolerated, no matter who the victim is or who the abuser is. Any person who wants to deny that there are male victims at the hands of abusive women are sexist and/or severely ignorant. Having known a gentleman who was abused by his wife for years, I know all to well that it is a reality. Its great that the issue is being raised in the media and I hope Pizzey is able to change the social stigma surrounding male victims and abuse.

Would you support this campaign against the abuse of men?

February 202010

Erin Pizzey, the campaigner who pioneered treatment for abused women by setting up the world’s first refuge centre for victims of domestic violence in the 1970s, is now turning her attention to another group of often overlooked victims: men.

Launching an online campaign and research project aimed at bringing the issue out in the open, Ms Pizzey, wife of broadcaster Jack Pizzey, aims to raise awareness of abuse perpetrated by women against men, a subject she describes as "one of the last taboos".

As many as one in six men are thought to suffer physical and mental abuse at the hands of women, yet the topic is widely seen as insignificant or implausible. Says Ms Pizzey: I feel that this kind of violence is one of the last taboos men are reluctant to talk about it, and so are the women who are doing it, said Ms Pizzey, whose father was abused by her mother. Much is known and studied about male violence, but very little is written about women, and any attempt to discuss female violence is met with rabid attacks and howls of ‘blaming the victim’.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/defender-of-abused-women-finds-a-new-cause-male-victims-770636.html

The truth is that the Domestic Abuse canard is that Feminists don’t want the problem resolved. Pizzey found that Feminists used it to fund their movement with Tax payers money. It became the core of their funding mechanism. Without it Feminism would have imploded. NOW has very few funding mechanisms. And Feministing.com’s Editor Jessica Valenti admits she barely makes a living from her Portal. The primary portal for the Feminist Movement in the US.

Feminists who support Women’s Studies are having difficulty finding real jobs for Women’s Studies Grads. Its like having a Buggy Whip business. Not alot of customers. Feminists are opposed to solving the Domestic Abuse problem for several reasons. Feminists goals are to divide Men and Women and to create distrust between the Genders. They declared Decades ago that Marriage was akin to Prostitution and their goal was to destroy it.

Now Feminists are blaming Men for bailing on Marriage. In the 1960s Women objected to being treated as "Sex Objects", now they have Cuntfests and call themselves Vagina Warriors. This is textbook mental Illness. Those of us around long enough cannot take Feminists seriously.

Domestic Abuse is a Human problem. Where violence is sometimes mutual, sometimes Males Primarily and sometimes Females Primarily. Feminists celebrated Lorena Bobbit mutilating and cutting off John Wayne Bobbit’s Male member. But ignored when she took a Butcher Knife to her Mother.

Lori Stokes featured on VVH-TV’s “American Dreams Show”

February 192010

Lori Stokes, Award winning news anchor for WABC-TV News was featured on VVH-TV’s “American Dreams Show” with
Ingrid Lemme, host. Taped on December 6th, 2008 at Gurney’s Inn, Montauk, New York.

As anchor of Eyewitness News This Morning and Eyewitness News at Noon, Lori Stokes has been an unflinching guide through everything from the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001 to the Northeastern Blackout of August 14, 2003. Along the way, Stokes has picked up Emmy and AP Awards for her reporting.
Prior to MSNBC/NBC Lori worked for ABC affiliate WJLA-TV in Washington, DC as evening anchor at six and 11 o’clock from 1992- 1996. While in the nation’s capital, she also launched WJLA’s Good Morning Washington.

She has received numerous awards for her reporting on social issues, in particular stories affecting women and children. As a street reporter from 1991-1992 for WBFF-TV in Baltimore, she received an Emmy Award for her in-depth coverage of children caught in the crossfire of local violence.

Her undercover journalistic work as a homeless person on the streets of Baltimore earned her an Associated Press Award. More recently, she received a 2006 Emmy nomination for a police chase on which she reported live in 2005.

Stokes is also the recipient of a George P. Foster Peabody Award for her September 11, 2001 coverage of the World Trade Center attack. On a national level, Stokes received the 2003 Congressional Black Caucus Celebration of Leadership Award for her civic service and her status as a role model.

This year, Stokes was named a “Woman of Influence” by Commerce magazine, placing her among the ranks of best-selling author Mary Higgins-Clark, philanthropist Deirdre Imus, and racecar driver Danica Patrick. Additionally, she is aiding the founding of a new charity, Supplies for Success, which aims to furnish underprivileged children with the tools they need, both tangible and intangible, to excel academically.

Stokes was just recognized in New York City by the Mayor’s Office to Combat Domestic Violence for her body of work and her extensive community outreach. “It may be difficult today to remember just how far we have come in 30 short years,” Stokes said of the cause, “There were no emergency shelters for battered women and their children; there was no law against spousal rape; and, yes, it was against the law for an abused woman fleeing her abuser to take her children with her. In these 30 years, much has been accomplished and the center against domestic violence has led the way.”

She is also now a proud member of Jack and Jill of America, an organization founded in 1938 under the leadership of Marion Stubbs Thomas with the idea of bringing together children in a social and cultural environment. The group primarily serves Black children from the ages of two to 19.

Stokes is one of the millions of people who live with potentially deadly food allergies and is passionately involved with the Food Allergy Initiative. She serves as a member of the board of trustees at Englewood Hospital and Medical Center Foundation, Bergen Performing Arts Center and St. Joseph’s Regional Medical Center in Patterson, New Jersey.

Although born in Cleveland, Ohio, Stokes grew up Washington, D.C. She is daughter of former United States Congressman Louis Stokes and the niece of Carl Stokes, who made history as the first African American mayor of a major city, Cleveland. Stokes was crowned Miss Azalea in 1983, representing the NATO Alliance; she was the first African American to ever hold the title.

Stokes is an alumna of Howard University and Ohio State University. She resides in New Jersey with her children.

Duration : 0:29:27

Read the rest of this entry »

Technorati Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,